February 15th...A Tragedy or a Blessing?

No photos with this entry, just testimony.

11 years ago today our family experienced a tragedy.  Of course now, 11 years later, I question whether it was actually a tragedy or rather, a blessing.  11 years ago today I was pregnant with our 2nd child, Emma Catherine.  We were just days away from being 36 weeks pregnant when I woke up and realized that I had not been woken up all night by her movements.  A bagel, glass of o.j. and some time flat on my back did not change the fact that this otherwise active baby was not doing the "good morning " dance.

After a call to my doctor I was told to head to the hospital where the nurses there would find her heartbeat and then send me home.  Needless to say, the day did not pan out the way the doctor expected. 

After trying to find her heartbeat and then being sent down the hall for an ultrasound, the doctors confirmed what her daddy and I were dreading.  Indeed, she had died at some point.  Thankfully my doctor agreed to a c-section so we did not have to labor.  I'm sure you are wondering why I would consider this day to have been a blessing at all.

At this point in our lives neither my husband or I were Christians; however, I did attend a M.O.P.S. (Mothers of Preschoolers) group which met at a local church.  When I called our Mentor Mom to let her know what happened, the entire M.O.P.S. group was praying as well as the charter church.  In addition more than 70 notes came to us from strangers at this church - strangers who were telling us about how much they were praying for us and sharing their stories and compassion.  Through this tragedy we were shown the true love of Jesus and it was just a a little over 2 months later that I was baptized - my husband just over a year later.

This tragedy has indeed been a major blessing.  Due to her short presence with our family, Emma and our Lord drew an entire family to Him.  We are forever changed.  We still think of her.  11 years later we still mention her at least weekly and mom still thinks of her nearly every day.

After 11 years I am encouraged to do something to help other mothers who are going through  a loss of their sweet babies.  It is a shame that it has taken me 11 years to find something to do in her name.  Check out this blog:  http://teenytears.blogspot.com/.  The founder of this outreach is actually a 2nd cousin somewhere on my family tree - a family member who I have recently re-established contact with.  Megan lost her sweet boy (a twin) 3 years ago and started this organization in his memory.  Teeny Tears makes cloth diapers for families who have lost a child due to stillbirth or early miscarriage.  Often these babies are to small for Pampers- even preemie ones.  Rather than introducing these angels to their parents with a naked bum, Teeny Tears supplies hospitals with 2 diapers per baby.  One for baby and one for mom and dad, as a keepsake. 

I am hoping to get started on a first batch of diapers for the hospital that lovingly took care of our family - so we can give something to the families that are suffering a loss, just like we did.  I say "hoping" because I am not gifted in the area of sewing, but my kindred spirit Megan assures me that it isn't at all difficult.  So, if you live locally to me and want to donate some flannel, feel free!

I often tell people that if Jesus came back today and offered to give me my daughter, in exchange for my family knowing Him now, I would have to say no.  I have no reason to exchange the rest of my years knowing my Savior for her because I am confident that when all is said and done, I will see her again in Heaven.